After a two month break the Scottish Premiership was back with a crash, bang and wallop and that was just at Rugby Park. Joel Sked looks back at an action packed first weekend.
The predictions were in, the previews were recorded and written – but not yet on the new site – and the bets were placed. Sixty one days after the tragicomedy that was Motherwell v Rangers which had you yearning for more, the new Ladbrokes Scottish Premiership season got under way at 12.45pm on Saturday.
Barely 180 seconds later Willie Collum was in that familiar stance with that non-plussed expression pointing to the penalty spot. His penalty spot. ‘I have missed you old friend’. A penalty spot fetishist. Obviously the no-penalty penalty he awarded to Everton against Heart of Midlothian less than a week prior did not provide the required levels of satisfaction. Up and down the county there were grumbles of ‘that’s just f**king typical’. Leigh Griffiths stood over the ball 12 yards from goal. Did I mention it was a stonewaller? Andrew Davies clumsily brought him down and it could be argued he was lucky to stay on the field. In fact he was. Yellow card? Nope. Nothing.
With Stefan Johansen adding a second, with many more likely on the horizon for the Norwegian, it suggested that Ross County were set to be on the end of a rugby score. Yet they acquitted themselves well in the second half and posed a greater danger while highlighting Celtic’s problem when Nir Bitton is not stationed in the centre of the park.
An early performance of the season has to be awarded to Jackson Irivne. The Australian looks like he should be on a beach somewhere smoking a reefer and drinking bottles of VB in between riding the surf. Yet, once a Terrace Podcast joke figure, he has constantly evolved, turning himself into a dominating midfield presence. He displayed his athletic abilities in his latter period at Kilmarnock and again last season in Dingwall. A consistent performer full of energy and a combative figure.
Against his former team he replicated Scott Brown’s role for Celtic. But one aspect of his game which has flown under the radar is his ability on the ball. He took the ball in dangerous areas and used his surprising skill to create space or kept his composure and moved the ball on precisely. And rather than simply screen the defence he screamed forward, like a white Yaya Toure, when he saw space open. Such as the moment in the first half where he lost Brown before being upended outside the box by Craig Gordon.
The first controversial moment of the season brought an amusing moment at half-time when Neil McCann seemed to morph into a religious preacher, brandishing rules and speaking passionately direct into the camera, direct into the eyes of those watching at home. He was of the thinking that Irvine was denied a goal scoring opportunity. It was a borderline call. On first viewing the ball seemed to heading away from goal and Irvine. But on the replay there was a good chance he was getting onto the ball on his stride with the goal gaping and a Celtic player retreating. We are just happy for football to be back so Collum can be awarded the benefit of the doubt.
Of the 3pm kick-offs Hamilton Academical v Partick Thistle deserve very little for ruining it with a goalless draw. When you think about their respective teams and their hopes for the season the score line was not a surprise. Frederic Frans was given his marching orders less than 30 minutes in. If those were his only two fouls in the game he was incredibly unfortunate to be given an early bath. Do footballers still take baths after games or were baths consigned to history when the FA Cup lost its lustre. You don’t see players rejoicing in a bath together with bottles of champagne any more, trying not to get their perms wet. I digress. Going by Sportscene’s thorough highlights – more on them later – Ali Crawford is still going to be a threat from long distance.
Moving north and Motherwell made a mockery of the bookies with a comfortable 1-0 victory in Inverness – you could have invested healthily in a price of 4/1. Already reeling from the losses of Graham Shinnie, Edward Ofere and Marley Watkins ICT are set to miss Gary Warren for a sustained period of time following a leg break. As concerning is a significant goal threat, the Caley Jags offering as much penetration as a guy who has been on the swedgers at a festival all weekend.
The game of the day was at Rugby Park where the new-look Gary Locke team resembling the old look Gary Locke Heart of Midlothian welcomed the Dees of Dundee. What transpired was a massacre. Some Killie fans were left waiting outside the ground as the game got underway. Imagine it. Having to wait more than you should to pay money to see a family member brutally assaulted. The cacophony of boos with the bonus addition of a fan chucking his scarf onto the pitch at full-time were exactly the sounds and sights you missed during those lonely football-less weekends spent pretending to care about other sports.
Dundee were rampant. The movement and interchanging of the front three, like perfectly choreographed ballet dancers, was sublime. Greg Stewart in particular put in an enchanting performance, drifting in from the left to pick up possession behind the flat midfield four. They could have been comfortably in front before Stewart smashed in the opener and by the time he had got his second, aided by comic defending from the home side, Dundee were well worth their four goal lead.
Locke’s men put in a passive and pathetic performance with Kevin Thomson having the run of the midfield. Tipped to do well before the season, Paul Hartley’s men laid down a firm marker of their intentions.
Sunday saw the return of Heart of Midlothian to the top division and after a frantic 90 minutes of football against St Johnstone, it was clear *puts on Maroon tinted glasses* they had been missed. A raucous full house were treated to a enthralling second half with Hearts already leading 1-0 thanks to Brad McKay’s cartoon moment of going down like he had slipped on banana peel.
With Jamie Walker moved into a more central position and Juanma displaying both a velvet touch and a bulldozing approach Hearts were a constant threat going forward. With leads of 2-0 and 3-1 they would have been expected to see it out. But St Johnstone showed their capabilities. Often derided for their monotonous style of play, myself included, Saints roared back to equalise led by Joe Shaughnessy’s long-throws – he has to be useful for something – and Michael O’Halloran’s direct and powerful running. Liam Craig greeted the equaliser with a smug run and look towards Section N. ‘Welcome back to the big time, you mugs.’ Sam Nicholson steered in Callum Paterson’s tantalising cross to win it to leave the Hibs relegatee deflated.
And then the weekend’s finale. Dundee United v Aberdeen. Having made their way back from outer space in the week Derek McInnes rested key players. A test which would find itself on the acidic side of the ph scale, and one they would pass. Eventually. The pressure and play was all Aberdeen but even with the nervy Luis Zwick they struggled to turn their domination of the ball into clear cut chances. It was left to an unorthodox header from Kenny McLean to loop over Zwick and into the far corner to secure the three points. The midfielder should be given an abundance of credit for improvising with David Goodwillie’s awkward cross.
Initial impressions suggest Untied will, as expected, struggle to trouble the upper echelons. Zwick appears to suffer from the Rado Cierzniaks which means a new backline will have the added pressure of not knowing what he is going to do, when he is going to do it and how badly he is going to clatter into them.
A pleasing weekend of football to kickstart the season and it would be churlish to finish on a negative but . . . Sportscene. Anyone who knows me or listens to the show will know I am all about positivity and optimism but the highlights show was an absolute embarrassment which perhaps deserves an article in itself. It was on for nearly an hour. Two of the games amounted to little over four minutes of highlights between them, there was an array of weird camera angles, while Dundee fans would have been mortified to see there was more fan interviews than highlights of their thumping win.
Things can only get better from here. You would think. But most importantly we have got our football back. If week one is anything to go by we are in for many talking points, entertaining games, great goals and best of all gaffes. Lots and lots of gaffes.