Our inglorious bastard of a leader, Craig Fowler, goes through the football related questions you’ve sent us over the past week.
In junior football they have an East v West select that play out once a season. Based upon this season what would the respective line ups be and who would win overall (excluding Celtic). The East – West split is quite easy to determine this season. – Murray Hughes
This would be a good marketing tool for the league to have if it wasn’t for the torn-faced members of the media who would just rip into such a game in the press, making the whole showcase completely redundant.
Anyway, here’s my teams for this season.
East
Jamie MacDonald; Dave Mackay, Mark Reynolds, Gavin Gunning, Andy Robertson; Stuart Armstrong, Wilo Flood, Peter Pawlett, Gary Mackay Steven; Nadir Ciftci, Stevie May
I originally picked Steven Anderson and I do believe he’s the better defender, however I think Gunning has had the better season out of the two. He’s really become a dominant defender and it would have been an even better year for him if United could find a stable defensive partner – they’ve used four other centre backs at different points in the season. Further forward Billy Mckay is very unlucky to miss out but how could I leave out either of Ciftci or May. Barry Robson was a harsh omission but it came down to a toss up between him and Armstrong and the latter has just been phenomenal of late.
West
(4-4-1-1) Marian Kello; David Raven, Josh Meekings, Gary Warren, Graeme Shinnie; Lionel Ainsworth, John McGinn, Keith Lasley, Iain Vigurs; Kallum Higginbotham; Kris Boyd
Shinnie over Aaron Taylor-Sinclair? Yeah, as good as ATS has been in his debut season I just think Shinnie has been outstanding this term and has risen to become one of their top five players. Three members of the Motherwell midfield was an obvious inclusion seeing how many games they’ve won despite a leaky defence and the amount of goals John Sutton has scored without the ability to move. Higginbotham was a must, particularly given his form since the turn of the year while Boyd shades it ahead of Sutton for me.
If they were to play against each other I would give the west coast the nod on this occasion. Looking at the two, they’re the more rounded team and having three ‘Well players and the entire ICT defence would give them a coherency that would stand them in good stead during the match. I wanna watch this now that I’ve thought about it. They could host it somewhere central and allow children in for free and charge adults a £5. That would get some good feeling back into the game.
SPFL decide to bring back the Tennents’ Sixes (we all wish this to be true). Who’s the starting eleven for each team? – Duncan McKay (@DuncMcKay)
If you read interviews of players who used to feature in this it’s amazing how seriously everybody took it. Not only would teams point out full strength squads, but that the footballers would actually play hard during the matches. That’s why I disagree with your point about us all wanting it back. I would definitely have it back in its original form, but with players increasingly looking at football as a career and club’s obsessed with player fitness and avoiding injuries there is no chance you’ve get everybody playing with that kind of intensity. Can you imagine if Celtic lost Kris Commons for the season because he ruptured his knee after a collision with some boardings?
Sorry to be a killjoy. I just wouldn’t want some soulless exhibition contest smearing the great tournament’s legacy. However, should it happen and the league demand that everyone play a full strength side then this is what I think the starting line-ups of each team will be.
Aberdeen: Langfield; Anderson; Robson, Flood, Pawlett; McGinn
You’ll notice two running themes throughout the rest of the Premiership sides: older guys are good and smaller guys aren’t at a disadvantage unless they also possess a slight build. The physical demands on the older players aren’t as harsh as 11-a-side and since the ball is not allowed to go above head height you don’t need anybody tall; even though you do need someone with strength to muscle out opponents. Pace is aslo a bit overrated but Pawlett gets in for his quickness, while McGinn is in ahead of Rooney because he’s more versatile.
Celtic: Forster, van Dijk, Lustig, Brown, Commons, Griffiths
Commons would score a goal a minute in the Tennents’ Sixes. We’ve all been on those five-a-side teams with a forward who stations himself in a central position around 10 yards from goal and then just turns and shoots (and scores) whenever the ball comes near him. That’ll be Commons. Also, imagine trying to get past Virgil van Dijk with the lack of space on those pitches?
Dundee United: Cierzniak, Paton, Rankin, Gauld, Mackay-Steven, Ciftci
Incredibly harsh on Stuart Armstrong, but his close control just isn’t as good as the three attackers I’ve selected ahead of him. I seriously considered leaving out Ciftci because of his laid back attitude in crowded areas, but then I talked myself out of such stupidity. He’s too good to leave out! I omitted Gavin Gunning for Paton because the latter is just got such a bulldog. Gunning’s balance could be better and his height doesn’t give him any advantage.
Hearts: MacDonald, Wilson, Hamill, Stevenson, Paterson, Carrick
Wilson could be the guy that calmly gets every attack started after taking the goalkeeper roll out. It’s important to have one of those guys. Solid defenders are necessary but they have to be good with the football. It’s no use having a Michael Nelson type who just wants to punt it. There’s a number of better players I’ve left out – Sam Nicholson, Jason Holt, Jamie Walker– in favour of going with a team of bruisers. I know I included Ryan Gauld in the United team but he does better in tight areas than any of those guys. Though I’d consider Jamie Walker for Stevenson since the youngster can be very direct and wriggle through in tight spaces.
Hibs: Williams, Hanlon, Taiwo, Robertson, Stanton, Collins
OH MY GOD! This is how you get Collins on track! Have him play 6-a-side all summer, tell him not to move from a central position 10 yards from goal and just tell him to react to anything that comes his way. Don’t do anything else! His confidence will be up in no time. Anyway, is this the worst team in this response? The more I think about the current Hibs side the more I’m changing my mindset from ‘I can’t believe they’re so bad’ to ‘I can’t believe they’re not worse! How are they not 11th already?’
Inverness: Brill, Draper, Foran, Shinnie, Doran, Mckay
Thought about leaving Doran out as his pace wouldn’t be as valuable, but there’s an inventiveness to his game which is really underrated in my opinion. None of the back four, bar Shinnie, are particularly great footballers so I went for Draper and Foran to handle that side of things – I’m sure they’ll be fine. Shinnie would be great at dribbling the ball up the pitch all game and you’d love his tenacity in the sixes.
Kilmarnock: Reguero, Irvine, Slater, McKenzie, Eremenko, Boyd.
Yes! The perfect game for Eremenko. He doesn’t have to move… at all! His size and technique would stop anyone getting the ball from him. I also picked Reguero because I like his reflexes over Samson and there’s no high ball to be worried about. Irvine’s athleticism give him the nod over anyone else I can think of to play in defence.
Motherwell: Nielsen, McManus, Lasley, Ainsworth, Anier, Sutton
Harsh to leave out Iain Vigurs. While I said pace was overrated in this environment I still think you need somebody who can quickly launch attacks, and it came down to a choice between him and Ainsworth. He could have gotten in before Anier but I like their ability to bring two goal threats into this game. Nielsen, for me, has better reflexes than Lee Hollis. That’s the reason why he’s in despite the threat of a colossal f*** up every game.
Partick Thistle: Boyd, Taylor-Sinclair, Osbourne, Buaben, Higginbotham, Doolan
No out and out defenders but with the combined strength of Osbourne and Buaben I’m not sure it would be needed. Taylor-Sinclair can get up and down all day. Boyd would be able to concentrate on shot-stopping and I believe he’s better at that than Paul Gallacher. As for Doolan, I like his movement over Taylor who, I believe, does his most damage either (in 11-a-side) on the counter attack or running in behind.
Ross County: Fraser, Songo’o, Brittain, Kiss, de Leeuw, Arquin
The only thing particularly noteworthy about this team would be Fraser in goals. I believe Mark Brown to be better at commanding his penalty area but this wouldn’t be an issue. I don’t know a whole lot about Fraser, so I’m just assuming that he has better reflexes than Brown because, if not, why the hell was he starting over the more experienced stopper earlier in the season?
St Johnstone: Mannus, Mackay, Cregg, Croft, May, MacLean
Cregg’s just a little terrier and would fit nicely in an otherwise very attacking team. Mackay can cover any defensive role so that gives him the nod over Steven Anderson or Brian Easton. It was a close call between Lee Croft and Nigel Hasselbaink. Both have good balance but Croft is just a little more dependable. Is May and MacLean together overkill in a six-a-side game? Probably. I couldn’t split them up, though.
St Mirren: Kello, McGregor, McGinn, McLean, Newton, Thompson
Thompson’s height is obviously of little use but he’s a wily character, good finisher and can still throw his weight around. I think St Mirren would have a serious chance at winning a remade Tennents Sixes. It’s the only form of football where Lennon could play his five centre midfielders approach and still actually win.
If your life depended on a penalty kick being scored, which Scottish Premiership player would you pick to take it? – Craig Anderson (@craig_killie)
What a question! It’s a shame I can’t take players from the past because Paul Hartley has already done this. Had we folded at the end of the 2005/06 season and finished in third behind Rangers I don’t think my body could take the crushing disappointment and would have just packed in. He spared me such a fate by ramming that penalty home against Aberdeen.
As for current player I’m going to have to go for Kris Commons. It was a toss up between him and Leigh Griffiths for the obvious reasons that the pair are the best strikers of the ball in Scottish football. Commons just seems the more ruthless of the two at present. Griffiths is more exciting to watch but for every stunner he does tend to miss a good chance. That will improve with age. Kris Boyd is obviously another candidate but he’s missed the only one I can remember him taking earlier this season and I would be a little nervous about trusting him with my existence.
Of course, Commons could not be told about my allegiances to a certain team from Edinburgh. If this got out prior to the taking of the penalty, I fear Neil Lennon would give him instructions to deliberately miss and leave me facing the firing squad.
Did Neil Lennon deserve to be nominated for manager of the year? If not, who did? – Connor Gardiner (@connor_gardiner)
I don’t have a problem with this whatsoever. Looking at the manager of the year candidates: McCall, McInnes and Wright have to be considered locks. It was really between McNamara and Lennon for the fourth and final nomination. I know United fans are going to hate me for this, but I actually think Lennon deserved it out of the two.
There’s no doubt that Jackie McNamara has done a tremendous job in his first full season at Tannadice. The captures of Nadir Ciftci and Andrew Robertson could easily be #1 and #2 in the Signing of the Year award. They are also one game away from winning the Scottish Cup for only the third time. The football has been brilliant, the rise of these younger players makes everyone feel better about Scottish football and they’re an improved team on last season… why did I pick Lennon again?
Oh yeah! 91 goals scored, potentially 100 points accumulated and the longest clean sheet record in Scottish Premier Division history. I don’t think we should be allowed to disregard the achievements of the champions in league football because they lost in the cups. I know the treble was expected of Celtic coming into this season, but the cups are not an indicator on how great a manager is. Do you want proof? Here are some of the managers to win either a League or Scottish Cup over the past 10 years: John Collins, Graham Rix/Valdas Ivanauskas, Peter Houston, Danny Lennon, Ally McCoist (allegedly). If we cannot use cup wins to define a great manager then we certainly can’t use exits to slander the reputation of a good one.
I can almost read the seethe on twitter already, telling me how Celtic are expected to hammer the opposition every week because the resources they have compared with every one else. Yeah, fair enough. However, if this is what’s supposed to happen then why doesn’t it happen more often? How come they are three games away from 100 points for only the second time in the 3 points for a win era? Yeah, sure, Rangers not being there certainly helps that. But in even without their closest rivals it’s not like they’ve ever gone undefeated against the rest of the league, like they were doing this season before a borderline red card away at Pittodrie put paid to that (I believe it was a red card but you’ve definitely seen them just given as bookings before). And remember that they’re supposed to be better against the rest of the teams when Rangers are a equal force because there is more to play for. Getting a team ready to play all of these games where there is absolutely nothing on the line is great man management.
It was a close call and if anyone wants to tell me they believe McNamara should have gotten the last nomination then that’s absolutely fine with me. I love playing devil’s advocate when it comes to football, and this may even be what I’m doing now, but I still believe Lennon deserved it.
…
*What? What do you mean?… Oh aye! ****!*
Ignore everything I just said. Alex Neil should have been the last candidate for Manager of the Year. I have completely forgotten that it could be a gaffer from any division. My bad. Anyway, yeah, Neil: what a job he did!
The lower leagues are always a bit random so it’s hard to herald a successful manager off the back of one season. Remember that John McGlynn brought Raith Rovers within a couple of games of the SPL a few years back? However, nobody thought that Hamilton stood a chance of winning the division this year. They were relegation candidates throughout the majority of last season and only made a late season run because Stevie May finally grew into himself and started scoring goals like his life depended on it. With May gone it was expected they would regress once again. Instead they flew out of the traps and will likely be denied promotion back to the top flight by just two points. The signings of James Keatings, Anthony Andreu and Jason Scotland have been inspired and he’s built a great team unity with that side. Guys like Darian MacKinnon and Martin Canning are such unfashionable players but they perform a valuable duty within Neil’s system. What a great job and he should have been rewarded for it.
Will Leeann Dempster be shit at her job now that she’s moved to Hibs? – Craig Cairns (@craigcairns001)
Probably. I’m being serious. Have Hibs ever looked into the possibility that someone may have put a hex on them circa 2007? Like ‘the curse of six pack John’ or something similar? Everything Hibs have done ever since then we’ve nodded our approval and gone “yeah, decent move”, and yet when we look back on the very same moves there’s a 95% fail rate. It would be different if they were hiring John Brown or giving out three year deals to William Gros. Moves that we know are barmy from the beginning.
There’s not much I can say about Dempster because I’m obviously limited in my knowledge of what makes a great chief executive. Her team has certainly prospered over the last few years, but then they’ve had a succession of good managers: Mark McGhee, Craig Brown, Stuart McCall. Even the one failure in between, Jim Gannon, was an excellent identifier of talent – bringing in John Ruddy, Steve Jennings, Chris Humphrey and Lukas Jutkiewicz. The strange thing is that two of those appointments were probably bigger gambles than anything Hibs have done over the past few years. Brown hadn’t successfully coached a club side since the 1980s while McCall had a sacking by Bradford as his only other managerial position on his CV.
It was a major coup getting Mark McGhee when they did, seeing as the former Aberdeen striker had enjoyed success, at least briefly, in every stop he’d made in English football, and maybe that’s what Hibs need. Maybe Dempster needs to hire someone not whom you think “huh, good appointment”, but where you go “how the hell did they get him!?” Losing breeds more losing and the reserve is also true. Hibs just need to find someone capable of doing it. Is it Terry Butcher? Next season will go a long way to telling us.
Hypothetical match-up of best regular starters from bottom 6 vs worst regulars from top 6. Who wins? – Gary Cocker (@garyphcocker)
Most seasons this question would be ridiculous. The amount of parity that exists beyond the Old Firm would enable the bottom six sides, three of which would have missed out on the elite section by a handful of points, to easily pool a better collection of players. This season, however, there exists a 17 point gap between 6th and 7th, really making this a true “split”.
Bottom Six Best
MacDonald; Paterson, Hanlon, Songo’o, Taylor-Sinclair; McKenzie, McGinn, McLean, Higginbotham; Boyd, Thompson
Top Six Worst
Nielsen; Ramsden, Wright, Gunning, Considine; Watkins, MacDonald, Vincent, Wotherspoon; Anier, MacLean
I wanted to only select guys who I’d consider first choice in their teams starting eleven so there’s many guys there – Gunning, Wotherspoon and MacLean to name a few – who do not deserve a “worst” tag above their name.
Looking over the pair I think it’s fair to say that the bottom six are the better side. They are better at goalkeeper; the defence isn’t as a solid but it would be better going forward at full-back, and the same could be said for the midfield. The strikers are also better if lacking a little pace. There’s a fair few grafters in that top six side so maybe they would nick it just for having a better work ethic, but on paper the bottom six have more quality.
Is this year’s team of the year actually that good? Who should be added and taken away? – Andrew Muir (@AndrewScottMuir)
Let’s have a look.
Goalkeeper: Fraser Forster (Celtic)
Defenders: Graeme Shinnie (Inverness Caledonian Thistle), Virgil van Dijk (Celtic), Mark Reynolds (Aberdeen), Andrew Robertson (Dundee United)
Midfielders: Stuart Armstrong (Dundee United). Peter Pawlett (Aberdeen), Kris Commons (Celtic)
Forwards: Steven May (St Johnstone), Kris Boyd (Kilmarnock), Nadir Cifti (Dundee United)
It’s a good representation of the best players in the league this season, which I guess is the whole point even though it doesn’t look like much of a “team”. Judging Commons as a midfielder is a little spurious as well. If you’re going to break it down into different positions why not go all the way? Who’s the best No.10? Who’s the best defensive midfielder? Who’s the best ****ing right back for chrissake!? Graeme Shinnie’s played there a couple of times but you can’t tell me who’s the league’s best. They clearly broke it down into goalkeepers, full-backs, centre backs, midfielders and forwards. I think they should have taken it down further. Also, only three Celtic players in a season where they might reach 100 points? As good as Pawlett and Armstrong have been, have they really been better than Scott Brown this season? Was Robertson better than Emilio Izaguirre? I’m not quite sure. It seems more like the popular vote than the deserved vote.
To be fair, I’m picking holes for the sake of it here. I actually think that’s not a bad team. I dunno why they have to make it into a team though. They’re not actually going to play. Why not just have a top 10?
If you have any question you’d like Craig Fowler and The Terrace guys to try and answer then please send them to show@terracepodcast.net or post them on twitter.
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